M's nanny

M has her not-so-pleasant side in the evenings.  Some nights this is not a big deal, other nights its a little scary.  Last night was a pretty scary night.  She fussed and freaked out from 8pm-2am.  We call this the purple-flailing-frog mode.  She gets herself all totally worked up, the arms flailing -- which then freaks her out even more, and she beats her head against your chest and tries to suck on you like she's never been fed in her entire life.  It's so sad, just breaks my heart. 

Today was the first day Dh went to work all day and M's nanny came.  We hired a wonderful Tibetan woman who works with babies from newborn to pre-school age.  She will come two days a week to help me out.  I was very hesitant about what it would be like to have someone hanging out in my house (it is a small house).  I only just recently started having a house keeper come once every-other-week, and that still kind of weirds me out (but I really, really needed some house cleaning help, and I LOVE it). 

I am hoping that by having the nanny come from virtually day 1 it will be easier for me to transition back to work slowly as the time comes, as it won't be like leaving M with a stranger.   Once M is eating on a somewhat less frequent basis I hope to be able to spend an afternoon or two at school each week for meetings.  But back to M...

We interviewed the nanny a few weeks or a month ago and fell in love.  She immediately won me over as she is very peaceful and just radiates a good aura.  Plus, a close colleague and his wife had nothing to say but wonderful about her (she cared for their two kids when they were younger, and still baby sits from time-to-time). 

She showed up around 9am and spent the vast majority of the day just holding M, changing diapers, and bringing M to me when she was hungry.  I took a wonderful 2 hour nap in the bed all by myself and a really long shower without feeling guilty.  I answered some email.  And then it was time for her to go.  While it was a little weird when I got onto the computer, I think this will feel more normal as time goes by.  In the meantime, I am over-the-moon about the little break. 

I feel refreshed.  It's wonderful to have M back in her moby wrap sleeping on my chest now.  I'm ready for the return of the purple-flailing-frog tonight.  Bring it on...  :)