The end game strategy

I had an OB appointment this morning and a fetal heart monitoring (non-stress test). 

Turns out that my body got started on this birthing thing a few weeks ago but nothing has changed in about 3 weeks.  So, the OB wants to take action.

Since she'll be in the hospital on Monday we are going to go in on Sunday night and start inducing!  They'll give me cervidil on Sunday night and some drugs to help me sleep.  At 6:30am on Monday I'll start pitocin.  If all goes well little M will be born Monday afternoon/evening.

I had feelings of "don't want to do that", realizing that I had developed a little scenario in the back of my mind about waking up with contractions, waking up Dh, laboring at home for a while, etc.  I guess I also had kind of wanted something about this pregnancy to start "naturally", as if it was meant to be.

But that's silly.  "Meant to be" makes no sense.  Just because something is random does that mean it was meant to be?  Was my miscarriage "meant to be"?  Was the tsunami and earthquake in Japan meant to be since it happened "naturally"?  Obviously the answer will depend somewhat on your religious leanings.  But for me, the answer is "no".

An induction, in many ways, makes life a bit less stressful as we go into this transition.  Part of what has been really hard on me this last week has been the anticipation and let-down.  Every morning I wake up a bit disappointed that I didn't go into labor.  And I have to psych myself back into enjoying what might be my last day of pregnancy.   

It looks like I have two more nights in my own bed before I have my baby!!!  I can't even begin to tell you how excited I am.  Little M will be here soon!!!!