I had my last progesterone suppository last night. Now I can pretend to be a normal pregnant person.
Hopefully this lasts for more than just a few days though.
My CVS test is tomorrow (wed) at 1.30pm. I'm a bit freaked to say the least, but am doing quite well (right now) at pretending like it is no big deal. It's wacked, but I'm more freaked about the risk of miscarriage than the results. I hope that isn't a bad omen -- not worried about the right thing. Maybe I'll start freaking out about results if/when I make it past the miscarriage possibility.
My sister offered to fly out to go with me to the apt. Very sweet and sincere.
My mom also offered to fly out to go with me to the apt, but this sure came out sounding more like a jab at dh for not being here than as a deep concern for me and proto-baby
I turned them both down, as it just felt like it was making a big deal out of something that will be easier if I pretend like it isn't a big deal.
Despite my obvious preoccupation with this not being a big deal, I did sleep well last night. In fact, I dreamed that I was visiting Sarah Palin at her house. This was a HUGE mansion and her kids were obnoxious. She made me wear orange high heels.
Do you mean that you hope your FEELING of being a regular pregnant lady lasts more than a few days? Or actually being pregnant? The second I am confident in, the first, I don't know. I stopped baby aspirin at 13 weeks and it really freaked me out!!! I asked the nurse about 100 times if she was SURE it wouldn't cause a miscarriage if I stopped. I still freaked. Stopping a treatment is scary, for sure. But it is time for you to stop the progesterone, and that is exciting. I bet it will take a few days after stopping the treatment for you to feel ok about it, though.
ReplyDeleteI too would be more scared of a miscarriage than the results. That makes sense. If the results are bad, there is nothing you could have done. If the test caused a miscarriage, you'd never forgive yourself. The latter would be a lot worse of a scenario. So your worries are in the right place. I just can't wait for this to all be over with, then you can totally just be a 'regular pregnant lady'! Odds are *strongly* in your favor that everything about the CVS test will be uneventful.
Oh, and your dream is very scary. Did you have to have your hair in a beehive, too? You weren't naked were you? I am picturing you (well, a random lady since I don't know what you look like) with Sarah Palin hair, dancing naked in orange patten-leather spike heels!! While S.P. herself watches. It is a disturbing image, yeah.
Thinking about you. Wishing you well tomorrow.
ReplyDeletewishing you the very best of luck with your cvs test. I hope you make your way easily into the second trimester!!!!
ReplyDeleteIn some respects, I don't feel like there's a "safe" place to make it to here ... but I do think that I'm getting a little bit braver as time goes by. Here's hoping that your test goes well, and that you're breathing a bit easier soon. Wish you had more in-person support right now.
ReplyDeleteI think its unfair that you got to stop your progesterone before me!! (I just stopped Sunday, at 12w3d, and went in to check blood levels today, and am hoping no more suppositories are required!)
ReplyDeleteOn the CVS -- you will be fine. I worried about the exact same things before the test, and only when results were due did I start thinking about those as well. My advice -- enjoy the ultrasound photos at the beginning (mine were on a very slick, high-res machine) and then when its time for the test, find a spot on the ceiling, focus, and breathe deeply. The Boy suggested (after) that I bring a stress ball, since I kind of crunched his hand. It's not super comfy, but you will be fine, as it's very brief.
Happy to answer more q's if you want, but if not, amd wishing you all the very best of luck!!
Wishing you good thoughts and wishing I had your email address so I could REALLY commiserate with you. However, there are things I'm not saying so I can't say them other than I'm right there with you and I can't help but wonder if there is such a thing as feeling like a regular pregnant person when you feel like a lab rat all the time.
ReplyDeleteWishing you the best of luck today
ReplyDeleteI hope that your CVS was smooth sailing and not too difficult to get through and you are taking a well deserved rest. On another note other than the scary stuff can't the CVS also tell you the sex of your baby?? Sending you big positive energy from across the pond.
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