Here we are again

I fell asleep around 10:30pm and dreamed fitfully of how I couldn't get comfortable enough to really fall asleep. I gave up around 1am when dh got home from work (poor guy).

I moved out to the couch with my body pillow and a beadspread from the guest room. I was actually doze-dreaming about that bedspread and had a physical yearning to wrap myself in it. Weird. I got up after a few minutes, laugh/complained/freaked out a little to dh, stretched out a bit, made a cup of peppermint tea, and now sit here writing to you all. I am feeling a bit better now.

I can't imagine what it must be like to have a difficult pregnancy. I have been so fortunate with such an easy pregnancy, but it is still hard work. The baby takes so much out of me, and as dh said tonight, she's growing a lot right now and that is a good thing, even though it is hard. It really is a wonderful thing. I am guessing that women who find themselves pregnant when they don't want to be must develop such a difficult set of resentful emotions, going through all the physical and mental difficulties.

It is frustrating yet also amusing to have a hard squirmy watermelon attached to my abdomen. Things like scooting in bed or adjusting positions on the couch are a struggle. My PJs get tangled around me and because I can't hoist my body very well I can't untangle myself. And then little M will shift positions so what was somewhat confortable a minute ago now feels like a hard jab against my ribs. It is quite cute that she has no comprehension of basic physics, you know the law about two objects not being able to occupy the same space at the same time? She just goes where she wants to go, her mother's ribs or other body parts be dammed. Coupled with this is an odd overall body creakiness that is hard to explain.

I am so freaking lucky not to have real pain or real problems, and I am so ridiculously lucky to get to be experiencing this and expecting little M's arrival in a month (or so). I just want to make sure that you all and the universe know how grateful I am, even at 2am when the umcomfortable insomnia attack strikes again.

Back to my peppermint tea, the guest bedroom bedspread, and "the girl with the dragon tattoo".